I enjoy working in cafes. At the next table, an entrepreneur pitches to an investor. And the investor gives him advice on how to approach his round.
A true story. Investor and entrepreneur at the next table.
Every 3 words, 2 are in English. Pitch deck, Venture Capital, Private Equity, Seed, Playbooks, Raise, Due Diligence, Appendix, Bootstrap, Grant, Feedback, 10X, Chief of Staff, SDRs.
He doesn't breathe between sentences. His face turns slightly red. The monologue is endless, stretching for at least 20 minutes without a single pause. Nobody taught him the paragraph break. But he talks about narrative.
The conceptual mix the investor has is brutal. His speech is like an infinite labyrinth in which he himself gets lost. But he is unimpeachable, because the status assigned to intermediating funds is incorrectly associated with knowledge.
The entrepreneur, for his part, listens attentively, eyes wide open, in absolute silence, with infinite patience, trying to figure out what is happening.
Inside, he convinces himself that the money he thinks he needs will never come. There is too much he needs to learn.
When the investor's inexhaustible verbiage finally ceases, without having listened to anything, with the conviction of an expert and a firm gaze, he closes with an I like your proposal.
And he reopens hope. He keeps the funnel moving.
When will we end this farce once and for all?
Venture Capital is the closest thing to a Ponzi scheme.
